Am I in Denial?
We had our usual Date Day yesterday, and had a good time, as usual. It was windy and cold, and I was bundled up. DH was in short sleeves, enjoying the brisk fall weather. We’ve always been at opposite ends of the hot natured, cold natured spectrum, and it looks like the PD is just going to make that worse :).
We found a few good buys, but at one of the estate sales we found one of those deluxe model walkers with the padded seat and all the extra pockets that really looked brand new. The daughter selling everything said her mother had only used it a few months, and that’s exactly what it looked like. She didn’t want much for it, as I’ve been pricing them, and I knew it was a good buy. So, even though I don’t need it now, we bought it.
As we paid for it, she made some remark about how I was going to enjoy using it, and I replied that I couldn’t really say I would enjoy using it, but I knew that I would eventually need it. My DH went on ahead to the car, so he could figure out how to pack it away, and when I caught up with him, he had tears in his eyes. I, on the other hand, was totally unaffected. When I asked him about why he thought it was bothering him so much more than it did me, he answered that maybe he loved me more than I loved myself.
That’s a load to think about for sure! It did get me to thinking that maybe all my “busyness” reading about Parkinson’s and writing this blog is somehow a way to block out my emotions about it. I don’t know. All I do know is that for right now I’m honestly not upset by all this. It’s certainly not because I haven’t read about how horribly debilitating it can become, because I’ve read plenty of that. All I know is that I’ve laid it in God’s hands, and I’m trusting Him to make the best of whatever happens. I do pray daily that my DH will find some peace about this whole situation.
I TOO AM TRUSTING GOD. I TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME. I DON’T WORRY ABOUT TOMORROW, BECAUSE I KNOW HE HAS TOMORROW ALREASY TAKEN CARE OF. I HAVE BEEN READING MORE ABOUT PD THAN I EVER HAVE BEFORE, ALMOST ALL ON THE INTERNET. BUT I DON’T THINK ABOUT WHAT I READ AFTER I TURN THE COMPUTER OFF. I AM GLAD TO KNOW THAT YOU ALSO ARE TRUSTING GOD.
Pokie, is that you??? LOL!!
I can’t imagine being able to turn off thinking about what I read on the Internet, when I turn the computer off! Good for You!!!
I can’t even imagine what it must be like for people who get news such as my Parkinson’s diagnosis, but don’t have faith in God’s grace and mercy to lean on.