I am definitely less depressed since gradually cutting the dose and frequency of the Clonazepam, but I still have on days and off days. Thursday I went until sometime after 5:00PM without any facial tics at all, and then spent the whole evening jerking like crazy. When I’m like that, my face contorts, my left shoulder jerks forward, and my foot dances a jig uncontrollably. I was on a half pill only at night then. Friday I jerked and twitched all day long, also on the half pill dose. I also had a huge startle reflex while we were out on our Date Day, something I haven’t done to that extent in some time. Now today, Saturday, my mouth is all quiet and well behaved so far. I did not take even the half pill of the Clonazepam last night.
I had called twice to UAB, trying to get them to go on and send in the prescription for an alternative to the Clonazepam, because our drugstore would be closed from Friday evening until Tuesday. They did not get it called in, nor did I get a callback from a member of Dr. Watt’s team. The receptionist did tell me on my second call that Dr. D was sick. He is the member of the team who apparently is the one I will be seeing the most. So, I have to assume that is why nothing was taken care of.
I have found that I can at least mask what my mouth is doing in public by chewing sugar free gum. I’ve always been a gum smacker, so I am trying to get out of that habit, and reach a point were I can slowly chew and control the horrible twisting, twitching, and jerks my mouth does so much.
The right foot continues to do its own little dance, which makes me feel unstable as I stand still or walk. Going up and down steps is harder when there is no way of knowing what my foot is going to do at the moment. So I am still using the cane everywhere except here in the house and at church. The few steps I have to deal with at church are entrances, and hubby is there with me going in and out, so I can skip the cane and feel a little more inconspicuous.
I should have taken the last dose of the Clonazepam last night, but I thought it would be wiser to see how I would be today, rather than being even more unpredictable than usual for church tomorrow morning. Since I’ve been OK today, it looks like the decreasing dosing was done slowly enough to not leave any withdrawal symptoms. But there is now way of knowing how I will be in the next minute, let alone tomorrow for church.
I continue to stay busy searching and posting on our Lost Toy blog, and have been able to help quite a few families, thanks to all the folks who read the requests for help and search for them, too. If you have never been to that blog, you ought to go read some of the stories and try to help them. It’s a very satisfying feeling to help them. And I continue to add to our online Plush Toy catalog, too, so I stay very busy.
Oh, and I mustn’t forget to mention that it looks like our Centipede grass is actually beginning to come up in the composted side yard. I worked for a little while this morning in between the shrubs and the driveway, digging that section up and trying to get as many of the weeds out of that section as I can. We can plant Centipede here until July, so I should have it ready long before then.
Take each moment as it comes, Rosemary – a lesson I am being taught daily.