I have been counting the days until this Prevpac was finished, because the strong antibiotics have sapped my energy something terrible. My tummy is still tender and I get very uncomfortable after anything, even water, is swallowed. So I don’t think the ulceration in my lower stomach is healed yet. I have felt a little better since I started eating a little something with each medicine dose, and I spread my meds back out over the day the way they used to be. I’m hoping that will keep my stomach from getting irritated and inflamed so badly again.

I am blaming this on the stress that the Clonazepam put me under, plus I have a long standing problem with GERD and have had ulcers before. I have not felt like exercising for a long time now, and I know that I need to, whether I feel like it or not. But the thought of moving is just so overwhelming. There are days when everything seems like such an effort. It’s hard to explain, but sometimes the thought of even getting up to go get a drink of water seems to be too much.

I’m not really depressed, the way I was with the Clonazepam, but just totally wiped out physically, which leaves me low on brain power, too.

So I am celebrating that this is my last day of this stuff and hoping that I see some improvement in my digestion this next week. If I don’t I’ll have to call the Gastro’s nurse, and I suspect he will put me back on another two weeks of this stuff. That’s what happened the last time I had an ulcer.

As for the jerking and tics, I am doing just fine. I have them more as the day goes on, but nothing at all like they used to be. I still startle in an odd way over the least little thing. My body seems to paralyze for a moment, my eyelids flutter, and everything goes blank for a second or two. Then I come out of it and usually realize that whatever startled me was trivial.

I have been able to use the relaxation techniques I learned a long time ago when I was being treated for Functional Dysphonia. I am using the low register of my voice, instead of allowing it to be the high pitched “female” voice. I have sung alto since elementary school, so that is a good indication that my speaking voice should probably be lower than what I normally use. Making a conscious effort to breath at the beginning of make a sound and letting it come from down deep has taken a lot of the strain off of my vocal chords, so I am not choking and gagging with a horrible tickle all the time any more. This was obviously stress induced, and that means I can control it to a great extent.

So once again I choose to look for the positive improvements I have made and hope and pray for continued good progress.